Blogger versus the Cuisinart Blade: Film at 11

The Cuisinart blade won. And then there was so much blood. It was one of those accidents that happens out-of-the blue. I was emptying my pots and pans cupboard as part of spring cleaning—getting to the bottom of things to clean.

I put my left hand into the lower part of the cupboard, and hiding amongst the quart saucepans was the chopping blade for the Cuisinart, which I didn’t see until my left index finger was being sliced open along it.

When digits are sliced open they bleed profusely. It’s a little startling. Since I was in the kitchen, I thought about the ice packs in the freezer, and applied one top and bottom to the finger. That stopped the immediate river of blood and allowed me a moment to think.

I gave it some time, but when I took the ice packs away, the gushing started again.

And that left only one thing to do: jump in a cab and walk into the emergency room of New York Presbyterian Hospital. I couldn’t even change my clothes because I was dripping blood everywhere. So my Family Guy Pirate Stewie/skull and cross bones loungewear would have to do.

I made sure I had id and insurance card, and in a practical moment of irony, I scooped up Seth Grahame-Smith’s Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter to while away the hours I would sit in the emergency room. It arrived the other day as part of my vampire reading, and its cover has blood smears on it, so a few more wouldn’t be so noticed.

In the end, they did not stitch the finger. Infections are so rampant in hospitals of late that they make no incision unless absolutely necessary. The gushing had abated, so they wrapped it up and we’ll see if nature does the rest. Even so, of course I felt lucky to have hospital insurance

Blogging will be light. I’m supposed to stay off of the finger for a week. You can re-route standard typing form not to use the index digit, but it’s slow and tedious. Back when all ten are firing correctly.

 Mapeel     5/16/2010     family